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OJ&B Horoscopes: April 2012

See what OJ&B sees in the stars for you with April's Horoscope !


See what OJ&B sees in the stars for you with April's Horoscope!

Aquarius: April showers bring may flowers.  Right now you may be experiencing less than perfect weather in your life but without rain there would never be fab flowers.  Think of this rough patch as an opportunity to gather all of the necessary tools that you will need to make your flowers the fiercest in the garden.  You better be ready to bloom for your life!

Pisces: Much like Lohan, you are ending an era and starting something new.  You could be leaving an old job to start a new one or getting emancipated from a 5 year probation stint and trying to get your acting career back by hosting SNL and guest starring on Glee.  No matter what it is, always remember that your talent has taken you this far and never second guess yourself.  You can and will do it!

Aries: Oprah says to never let a man dim your light.  I say never let ANYONE dim your light!  You shine bright every single day and some people are just jealous that they will never be able to illuminate the world like you.  Don't let them bring you down and don't try to dim your light to make them feel better.  YOU GLOW GIRL (or boy)!

Taurus: You have been trying hard to help a friend who reached out to you but they are doing nothing to help themselves.  You can only do so much especially if you are spoon feeding them what they need to do.  If they will not open their mouths to take the advice then they are just going to have to starve.  If they are really that hungry then they will eat.  After all, advice is fat free and only 100 calories.

Gemini: I really hate to quote Avil Lavigne but "Why you gotta go and make things so complicated?"  Everything is not as complex as you have been making it seem recently.  Making things harder than they need to be is not going to solve a thing! Take a step back, breath and start looking at things in a simplified way.  Twerk smarter not harder!

Cancer: Spring has sprung and that means that everything starts new and fresh.  It also means that it is time for spring cleaning.  While you are cleaning our your closet you should also start cleaning our your life.  Toss away old friends that are continuously shady and negative.  Once you have cleaned you can begin trying on new clothes and friends.  Remember to only buy if they are a perfect fit!

Leo: You seem to be going on a ton of dates lately (when it's right, it's right) but nothing seems to stick. Make sure that you are keeping your high standards and never settle for someone who does not have respect for you.  A mutual respect is key in a relationship and you are too grown and sexy to waste time arguing constantly.  R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Aretha sang about it for a reason!

Virgo: Now is the time to turn, "I always wanted to go," into "I just got back from..."  Stop waiting to travel and do it.  You have been saving up for a big trip and you finally have the means to do so! Like Mariah says, "Spreads your wings and prepare to fly."  While you are traveling make a new friend or two.  Then you can make a pact with a pants while y'all eat, pray and love.

Libra: Spring is the perfect time to get your life together!  If you have been feeling like you need change then now is the perfect time to do it!  Go shopping for new clothes, start working on your fitness and upgrade your life.  To sum it up, if you a fly girl get your nails done, get a pedicure, get your hair did (Thanks Missy)!

Scorpio: You may get the opportunity to do something that most people could only dream of but it may not be for you.  Just because most people would jump at the chance does not mean that you have to.  At the end of the day you have to live with your decisions and if you feel that this opportunity is not right for you at this time then don't do it.  What is right for others may be totally wrong for you and that is OK! 

Sagittarius: Being in a relationship can be a cool thing but not if it is the main focus of your life.  There are so many people who want to hang out with  and right now you seem to be giving all of your attention to one person.  Make sure that you are making time for yourself and for those people who kept your spirits up while you were dating hot mess after hot mess looking for your Boo.  Your friends need love too!

Capricorn: Do not let others dictate your actions.  There are people out there that claim to be looking out for your best interest but they are actually making you question acting like your usual self.  Remember that being yourself has taken you very far in life and you do not need a hidden hater trying to tell you to change.  If someone gives you unsolicited advice that throws up a red flag then trust that feeling and keep them at a distance.  They may fool others but they wont fool you, OKRR!

*Disclaimer: These Horoscopes were written for entertainment value by the creator of OJ&B, Jonathan Valdez, and should not be taken seriously at all! If something does come true though holla at your boy!
OJB Horoscopes 2977052979138818974

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